I remember what seemed like a couple of days ago, I was praying and patiently waiting for the right girl to come along so we could get married, pop out some kids and live happily ever after. I am happy to say that God answered my prayers! I met that girl, we got married, popped out the kids and 21 years later, I'm still on my "starter marriage". (Not bad considering I married up!) I remember when the little woman and I got hitched, it seemed like all of our other newlywed friends were having tons of difficulty getting and/or staying pregnant. That being the case, we decided it might be a good idea to go ahead and get started. That way if we had any trouble, we could address the problem sooner rather than later. I am happy to report we had no such trouble. My aim was true and a little over 10 months after our wedding, our first was born. To borrow a line from Ray Kinsella, "She smelled weird, but we loved her anyway". Our next child didn't come quite so easy. She arrived six and a half years and two miscarriages later.
Up until the day my youngest was born, I had spent my entire life looking and moving forward. I had always looked forward to all of the things involved with starting a family and a career and building a life. As our oldest child grew, we were excited to celebrate all of her firsts. Losing her first tooth, going to her first day of school, learning to ride her first bike... the list goes on and on. The point is, even through the life of my first child, I was still looking forward. It had never occurred to me that there would ever come a day when I would desperately want time to stand still. The first time it happened was when my baby lost her first front tooth. The rumor is that I cried that day. I, on the other hand, will deny everything, admit nothing and demand proof! Seriously though, in the same way I came to celebrate the older one's firsts, I came to mourn the baby's firsts. It is because her "firsts" had now become my "lasts" or more accurately, my "never agains". The first day of one thing, always marks the last day of another and sadly I always get that sinking feeling of knowing that I will never pass this way again. I will never again have a child that outgrows her diapers, or loses that first tooth or catches her first fish. I suppose that is why grandparents cherish their grandchildren so much. Hopefully one day I will have the pleasure of finding out. So, tomorrow I will celebrate my baby's first day as a teenager but tonight, I mourn as I try desperately to stop the clock....to stop my baby from turning "THIRT-STINKIN-TEEN!!!"
Daily Clifton-ism:
Wasted time enjoyed, is not wasted time.
Message from God:
Have faith.
Words of Wisdom from Grandmother:
If you eat your spinach, it will make you as strong as Pop-eye.
Okay friends, that's it for this time. I know this post was kind of a downer but have no fear! My next post is already on deck and I promise you, it's a real doozy! As always, thanks for stopping by. CHJ
No comments:
Post a Comment